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Writer's picture Marilynne Cahn

Lasting Relationships

Updated: Jul 24, 2022

I loved reading this book by Clarissa Pinkola Estes...so much wisdom and perception about the human experience....Women Who Run With Wolves


A part of every woman and every man resists knowing that in all love relationships, there will be an element of death. We pretend we can love without our illusions about love dying, pretend we can go on without our superficial expectations dying. But in love, everything becomes picked apart – everything. The ego does not want it to be so, yet it is how it’s meant to be and the person of a deep nature is drawn to the task.


What dies? Illusion dies, expectations die, greed for having it all, for wanting to have all the beautiful only, all this dies. We can see why it takes abundant self -power and soulfulness to make that commitment.


We know that relationships sometimes falter when they move from the anticipatory stage to the stage of facing what is really on the end of one’s hook. This is as true of the relationship between a mother and her eighteen- month old child as it is between parents and their teenager, as between friends, as that between lovers of a lifetime or just a little time. The relationship begun in all bells and roses sometimes staggers when the sweetheart stage is over. Then instead of enacting a fantasy, the more challenging relationship begins in earnest and all one’s craft and wisdom must be called into action.



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